🏆 Lift What You Can’t See: Building Internal Strength
The room is loud, but your world shrinks to the bar on your back.
Music thumps off the cinder block walls. Plates clank, kids joke around between sets, someone is filming a PR attempt in the corner. You duck under the bar, feel the knurling bite into your shoulders, and take a breath that feels a little too shallow.
On paper you are ready. You have hit every workout, checked every box. The number on the bar is just five pounds heavier than last week. Everyone watching can see the muscle, the sweat, the work.
What they cannot see is the part that suddenly got louder.
The bar comes out of the rack and your legs wobble just enough to scare you. Halfway down, that quiet inner voice starts yelling. This is heavy. What if I fail. What if I get stuck. What if everyone sees.
You have about one second to decide who is in charge.
You can feel your heart jump, your breathing go choppy, your brain trying to hit the panic button. In that tiny space, you blink, lock your eyes on a spot in front of you, and tell yourself one simple thing:
Sit. Stand. One rep.
You do not crush some world record. You do not scream for the camera. You fight through the sticky part of the rep, stand it up, walk the bar back, and rack it with a small nod that almost no one notices.
Strength did that.
But not the kind they measure on the whiteboard.
🧬 The Insight
In sports we celebrate what we can see.
Bigger, faster, stronger. Speed ladders, weight room, vertical jump numbers.
But when the pressure hits, something else decides what happens next.
It is the stuff no one can see on a highlight tape
How you respond when you feel panic
What you do after a mistake
Whether you can stay present when your body is screaming to stop
Steve Magness, in Do Hard Things, argues that real toughness is not pretending you are fine.
Real toughness is noticing what is happening inside you, then choosing your response on purpose.
That invisible strength is what lasts.
🏈 The Story: Two Kinds of Strong
Picture two athletes.
Athlete A looks the part. Jacked in the weight room, big squat numbers, walks with swagger. Before games, he talks about grinding and never quitting.
Athlete B looks normal. Solid, but not impressive at first glance. Quieter. Spends more time watching, listening, doing the work.
Game time.
A makes an early mistake. You see the shoulders slump. Self talk goes negative. He starts forcing plays, chasing the mistake.
B makes an early mistake too. You see a quick breath. A small nod. Then eyes are back on the next play.
Both are strong physically.
Only one is strong enough inside to stay who they are when it matters most.
By the fourth quarter, the difference is obvious. Not in the biceps. In the decisions.
🔁 The Shift: What Tough Really Means
Old picture of toughness
Stuff your feelings
Push harder no matter what
Never show weakness
If you are hurting, just grind
New picture of toughness from Do Hard Things
Face reality instead of faking it
Listen to your body and emotions as data
Create a small pause between this hurts and I react
Choose the best next action, not the loudest one
Tough is not I never quit.
Tough is I make the best call in a hard moment.
Sometimes that means pushing.
Sometimes that means adjusting.
Sometimes it actually means stopping.
🧭 What Internal Strength Really Is
Here is invisible strength in simple terms.
1. Honest awareness
“I am nervous right now.”
“My legs feel heavy.”
“I am mad about that call.”
If you cannot name it, it owns you.
2. Non panic self talk
Not fake hype, not trashing yourself.
More like a good coach on the inside
“This is hard and I can handle hard.”
“Next play.”
“Breathe. One rep at a time.”
3. Responding instead of reacting
Reacting looks like yelling at refs, throwing equipment, quitting mentally
Responding looks like a quick breath, a short reset phrase, then doing the next job
4. Anchored to something bigger
The hard moment sits inside a bigger story
“I am learning how to handle pressure.”
“This is who I am becoming, not just how I played today.”
You build this the same way you build muscle. Reps. On purpose.
🏋️ Internal Strength Training Plan (for Athletes)
Run these three drills this week.
1. The Name It Drill (before games or practices)
When you feel nerves or frustration, quietly say
Name: “I feel ______.”
Reason: “Because ______.”
Response: “So I will ______.”
You are teaching your brain that feelings are signals, not commands.
2. Three Breath Reset (after mistakes)
Next time you mess up
Look up, not down
Take three slow breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth
Say one short phrase in your head
“Next play.”
“Ball back.”
“My job now.”
Then do the next assignment with full attention. That reset is internal strength.
3. One Hard Thing On Purpose (outside of sports)
Pick one small thing each day that is uncomfortable
Cold shower at the end for 30 seconds
Take the stairs
Start homework immediately instead of scrolling
While you do it, practice the same pattern
Notice discomfort
Name it
Choose your response
You are telling your brain, “I can feel hard things and still act.”
👨👩👧 For Parents and Coaches
You cannot build internal strength for your athlete, but you can build the environment where it grows.
Try three shifts.
1. Praise responses, not just results
Instead of only “Nice hit” or “Great game,” add
“I liked how you reset after that error.”
“You were nervous and still did your job. That is real strength.”
2. After a tough game, ask process questions
Skip the lecture. Ask
“What did you feel out there when things got tight?”
“What helped you calm down?”
“What would you like to try next time in that same moment?”
You are teaching them to notice, not numb.
3. Model it yourself
Let them see your own resets
“I was frustrated today, so I took a few deep breaths before I responded.”
“I wanted to yell, but I decided to take a walk first.”
They will copy what you are, more than what you say.
🎯 This Week’s Challenge
Athletes
Pick one situation this week where you usually react on autopilot. Decide your reset phrase and your three breath plan ahead of time. Use it once. That is a rep for invisible strength.
Parents and coaches
After the next game, ask one question about how your athlete felt, not just what they did. Then listen.
Muscles fade. Speed slows.
Internal strength is what carries athletes for a lifetime.
Lift what no one can see.